Sunday, September 30, 2007

Church

Things have been going wonderfully for the Butlers, other than one minor situation. It's clear that the Big Man is watching over me.

Yes, Andy Griffith. He's watching down from Heaven, protecting me from the evil paper company where I was once employed. He even helped me get a nice severance package...well, that was more Matlock than Andy.

In honor of this divine intervention in my life, and despite my non-belief, I decided to take Claire on a trip to an old church here in Costa Verde. What better way to start a new life than with a cleansing religious journey and a couple hotdogs from a street vendor?

"Greetings, my children," the priest said to us as we stepped into the cathedral. "Sorry, you can't bring that inside."

I looked at Claire.

"No, not her. The hotdog."

I stuffed the last bite in my mouth and said, "Nnhmm kkkinnn aaeee?"

"Come on in," he replied. Claire and I walked inside. The priest left to his rectory. I looked around at the magnificent artwork: religious murals, sculptures of people doing stuff, wooden seating things. It was an amazing sight! If only The Haitian was here, I thought. He was always such a spiritual fellow. Plus that hotdog was rather disgusting and I could have used him to forget this aftertaste.

Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne blasted out of Claire's cellphone. She flipped it open and said, "Oh, my God, it's like Sarah! I bet she totally wants to tell me about how awesome my new shoes are." She stepped into the confessional to answer the call. I could hear the muffled sounds of teenage girl talk echoing throughout the chamber.

Then, a light caught my eye. It seemed to call me toward it. The light was mystically shining through a high window, the beam visible in the dusty atmosphere of this medieval building. "A Jesus light!" I gasped and made my way toward it.

Then I saw him! He was a tad transparent, but I could see his face clearly. And he saw me.



"Noah," he said, "A flood is coming!"

In a panic I jumped on top the nearest pew, so as not to get my feets wet.

"No, no, no," Andy said, "Not that kind of flood. It's a metaphor, my son. You are the only one that can save humanity. You must build an..."

"Ark?" I interrupted.

"Now what good would a big wooden boat be against super powered humans?"

"Hmm..."

"No! You must build an army. Unite your friends together, turn your enemies into fellow combatants. The evil you will have to face is too strong for any one man."

"I understand," I replied. I started to cross myself out of respect, but forgot the motions.

"Now, do you have any questions of me before you go?"

"Well, I want my family to be safe. And for some strange reason, I have the feeling we're being watched. I covered my tracks well. The company doesn't know where we are. But I still feel someone is watching us. Is the company on to me?"

"Noah, relax. The company is no threat to you."

"What about Gabriel?"

"His name is Sylar!" Andy corrected in a sinister manner.

"Sorry," I said, "What about Sylar? I think he's dead, but someone online is pretending to be him. Could he have survived? I had a conversation on AIM with someone claiming to be Sylar. And it seemed like him too! All the girly mannerisms came out in his typing. Is it really him? Is Sylar still alive?"

"This you must discover on your own, Noah."

Suddenly, Claire was yelling in my ear, "Daaaaaad!!! Hello???"

I turned.

"Gah! You were like totally spaced out or something. Can we like go now? I want to go lie on my bed and fiddle with my hair."

"Sure," I said. I turned back to Andy, but he was gone. I put my arm around Claire and walked toward the exist. "Didja ever get the feeling you was being watched?"

"Uh, like, duh! I'm all hot and stuff."

As I walked out of the church, I couldn't help feeling like someone was watching us. Could it be the company? Could it be Sylar? Or even something worse than either of them?

"Take picture, five dollar!" a man called out to me.

"What do you say, Claire Bear?" I asked. "Should the Butlers start on a new photo album?"

"No way, Dad. That's so gay."

"Come on. It'll be fun. A beautiful church. Let's get our picture."

I managed to hold what may look like a smile, but as I posed I couldn't shake the feeling someone was watching me.

1 comment:

Elizabeth said...

Your smile is sooo like mine. And I wear glasses too, astral twin! Oh, BTW did you ask dr Suresh about having an astral twin?

Say "hello" to Gabriel from me. I need to ask him if he would lend me his book about cooking brains. I think I would like to try one.