Sunday, May 6, 2007


Are you as nervous as I am? Probably not. No, it's not because Other Me is off to New York. New York is a nice place, I've been there several times. There's no danger there.

I'm worried about being voted off of Last Gladiator Standing 2!

I'm also worried about weight gain. The challenges have been mostly physical, so I'm getting my exercise, but the food here is amazing! I don't know what it is exactly, some kind of alien grub, I suppose. But I can't stop eating it! It's way better than Sandra's cooking, which isn't saying much.

I'm thinking I should bring my son, what's his name, up here. He's such a scrawny little dude. It's shameful as a father for me to have a kid that puny. But this food should put some meat on his bones. It'd be good for him, and good for his ego. When you're buff, or even just fat, you feel capable of taking on the world. No matter what it throws at you, barring of course mental anguish from being obese, you can make it through.

Of course, fat people are also dangerous. If one ever manages to get up to top speed, nothing can stop 'em. That's why I don't encourage having Svetlana participate in these challenges. It's an accident just waiting to happen! I already was almost killed by her large bosom. It's not as fun as it sounds.


Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

You could send your son What's-his-name to Camp Intergalactic Gladiator.

Professor Xavier said...

I can see why you haven't bothered to learn the boy's name. He doesn't have any powers, right?